Chastening

If you saw the video in the last post, you saw a reference to Elder D. Todd Christofferson's talk, "As Many as I Love, I Rebuke and Chasten". Here is the link to the talk: Elder D. Todd Christofferson

This is definitely the thing I need to be working on. Why? because it's the only way to truly have that relationship with the Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ.

Psalms 25:9: The meek will he guide in judgment: and the meek will he teach his way.

By the way, I've personally met Elder Christofferson (while he was serving in the Seventy) and this is a truly humble man. He lives what he preaches.

Choose To Become

Last month I had the opportunity to attend a Time Out For Women event in my area. Because the event didn't occur until November, the theme and a lot that went along with it was gone in less than a month. The blogs, however, are fortunately still up. If you don't know what a Time Out For Women event is, here is the link: TOFW

The events are sponsored through Deseret Book, so it's somewhat of a commercial enterprise, as the speakers and musical entertainment all have books and/or CD's they are selling at the event in the bookstore.

That said, there is a lot more to TOFW than a really long infomercial. I've been to these in the past, but this one made an impact on me. The theme for 2011 was Choose To Become. The talks were focused on some aspect to help the women attending to find ways they could choose to become a little more of what our Father in Heaven and the Lord know we can be. It's not focused entirely on being a good mother, it's focused on how you can take care of you while you take care of the young ones in your life.

I think the reason this impacted me so much is that for a while now I have felt like I'm at a crossroads in my life. Duh. Yes, I am. My eternal companion has been serving his mission for 11 years now on the other side, my father has been gone 5 years as of December 13th, I will most likely be moving in with my Mother at some point soon to provide her with whatever help she needs, and I have several projects on the burner that have either yet to be finished or haven't been started yet. I'm clearly at a crossroad in my life, it just a matter of figuring out which road to take next.

I thought I had a really good relationship with the Lord, but I'm finding that this relationship was at a child's level. This relationship needs to be at the grownup level if I'm going to really be able to find out where I need to be headed and what I need to be doing with my life. Coasting is no longer an option.

I got an email from TOFW for the DVD with a number of speakers from the 2011 Tour, and found there were some phenomenal talks (only 1 presentation I had seen in Phoenix, the rest were new to me) with scripture references and, for some, even notes for me to use with my studying. This, along with reading The Book of Mormon, reading Increase In Learning by David A. Bednar and going through all of the references is helping me to understand things with the grownup understanding I am seeking. Here's a taste from one of the fantastic videos on the DVD. If you can get your hands on this one, it's well worth the price.

A Few Messages of Faith

I've been sick this past week. After my second visit to the doctor on Friday, I was driving home and stopped for a long procession of vehicles, a funeral procession, going towards the local cemetery. It reminded me, as God often does, that while my challenges are indeed challenges, I've been through worse. He also reminds me that as bad as my week has been, someone has had a worse week. My prayers go out to all who mourn the loss of a loved one.



And if you're not at that level yet:

Continue In Patience

There are many of us who are waiting for promised blessings. If we trust and wait for the Lord, He will not let us down.

Changes, Beginning Anew

I don't know if this post is going to make sense, so please bear with me.

There have been a lot of changes in my life, changes that have forced me to face things I haven't faced before and do things I haven't done before.

If you read my regular blog, you know I recently had a health crisis. I had surgery to remove both an ovarian cyst and the ovary it was attached to. Thankfully there was no cancer. This is the second cancer scare I've had since Decker's death.

It's also been a time for reflection, looking at what is really important to me and, basically, finding out who my friends are. I've found the number one friend I have is Jesus Christ.

Saturday marked the 9 year anniversary of attacks from several fronts on American soil. I sat and watched, glued to the television, video I hadn't seen before of what it was like at the Twin Towers in New York. Watching firefighters and police officers racing to the towers, knowing many of them wouldn't come out alive. I thought of the trauma that so many people encountered that day, and felt somewhat shaken just by watching it.

Trauma changes people, changes their outlook, and changes lives.

I would have to say Decker's death was the biggest trauma I've had so far in my life, however the death of my father has come in second. Life is never the same after a traumatic event, but one thing does remain the same and that is the Savior Jesus Christ. He was there for me when Decker died, he was definitely there for me after my father's death, and I felt His peace upon me yesterday during Sacrament meeting. I was still reeling after what I had watched on television, but the words of the Sacrament Prayer brought peace and perspective.

The Plan of Salvation was still in effect.

Then there was the talk of "rebuilding". This word has an empty meaning to people who's lives have changed because of trauma. Can you truly rebuild? In my personal opinion, no. What was normal before will never be the same again, so those who have been affected by trauma cannot go back to the way things were before. Particularly where death is a part of that trauma.

The only building that can be done is when those traumatized move forward and, as I put it, begin anew. This means creating a new life, and a new sense of normalcy. Will it be the same as the old normal. Some aspects, such as a job, might be the same, however everything will take on new meaning with this new life.

Everything changes, including relationships with others.

This includes their relationship with the Lord, and in my opinion, it should.

A Couple of CNN Articles on Death & Grieving

These are stories of people of other faiths and how they have handled their grief.

Celebrating Life On The Anniversary of A Death

Navigating The Land of Grief Since My Son's Death

Forgiveness